CLICK ON ADS FOR MORE INFORMATION
.
CLICK ON ADS FOR MORE INFORMATION
.
PAGE LAST UPDATED 7th May 2010
|
RACING
|
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
JAGUAR
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
JAGRACING ELECTION 2010
OUR MANIFESTO
The aim of the JAGRACING party is to provide clear and to the point policies! Vote For JAGRACING!!!!
We will Ban:
1. Mondays and increase the hours during the remaining days as there are never enough!
2. Nissan Micras as they are boring, wont go over 40MPH and are pointless!
3. Blister pack products as you need a chainsaw to open them which is a Health & Safety risk and also bad for the environment!
4. Sellotape on packaging of loaves of bread. This also presents a significant Health & Safety risk plus it is bad for your blood pressure.
5. Sticky labels on products that take 3 hours and half a litre of Ozone unfriendly solvents to remove.
6. Packaging, ties, clips etc on kids toys that take two hours to remove, pose significant health and safety risks from choking and injury to children & animals plus significantly increases blood pressure for the adults.
7. Unpleasant music in shops and restaurants. This includes but is not restricted to everything you would hear on Radio one.
8. All drivers that can only drive at 39MPH regardless of whether it is a Motorway Dual Carriageway or 30MPH zone. (Note this automatically bans Nissan Micra drivers see 2.)
9. Robots that phone you when you are having dinner, watching something good on the telly, or otherwise indisposed or having a bad time.
10. DVLA. Everything they do is pointless slow inefficient wrong and a waste of everyone's time and money!
11. Any organisation, body, or company that sends you multiple choice reasons why they cant or wont do the simplest most straight forward task. Leaving you to spend hours of research only to find that it was their mistake in the first place! (This automatically bans DVLA see 10.)
12. Any organisation or company that will not give you a time + or - 1 hour for visiting your home for a delivery or service etc.
13. Yellow lines and parking restrictions in places that pose no risk or significant inconvenience to other road users. This will dramatically reduce carbon emission's from people driving round and round in circles trying to find that elusive parking slot.
14. Most speed cameras, although we do feel there is a good argument for having one outside my house!
15. People from complaining about things that they knew about (or should have) before they moved into their house.
16. Motorway warning notices. Having surveyed 10,000 regular motorway users, we have discovered that none of them have ever seen any sign of the hazard that they have been warned about. This is clearly very dangerous as usually careful drivers are looking for overturned sheep or discarded triangles etc instead of concentrating on driving safely. Turning them off and not making anymore will also help to save the planet!
17. User instructions and manuals for all products. These invariably make operations sound far more complicated than they really are, and none of them have ever been written by someone who has actually carried out the steps and tasks detailed. This will also help prevent baldness and save 10 billion trees a year.
AS IT LOOKS LIKELY THAT THERE WILL BE ANOTHER ELECTION SOON, WE HAVE ADDED A FEW MORE POLOCIES TO WOO A FEW MORE UNDECIDED'S
18. We will be banning cash machines that charge you for the privelidge of taking your own money out.
19. We will be banning wheel clampers saving countless lives due to blood pressure related illnesses.
20. We will be banning deliberate bumps in the road i.e sleeping policemen. We beleive that this will save many lives by speeding up Ambulances and reducing further trauma damage to patients by sudden shock waves. It will also save lives by reducing the damage caused to vital suspension components and tyres that need to be in top condition in adverse conditions. We have also estimated savings of 10 million pounds in additional hardcore, tarmac and labour.
21. We will be banning all road signs in motorway service areas. This we estimate will save a further ten million in wasted fuel and lost buiseness due to the number of drivers going around in ever decreasing circles trying to fathom out what the myriad of signs mean.
22. We will make it a custodial offence to task an employee with the job of telling the public that they can't do or go somewhere due to health and safety reasons, without telling them what the Health and safety implications are.
23. We will be banning Health & Safety, saving Trillions of pounds. Working on the theory that if you over do anything in life people will get fed up and ignore even the few sensible rules!
24. Ban Ipods, saving countless lives serious injuries & millions of pounds of taxpayers money. If you cant understand the logic of this we sugest you vote Lab/Con/Lib etc.
25. Ban fuel increases
VOTING JAGRACING will save billions & reversing the national debt, save the rain forests, reverse climate change, reduce heart attacks, reduce journey times, reduce baldness + much much more!
5.